It’s 2 a.m., God. The house has finally gone silent. Kids are fast asleep, I’ve shut down the emails, and now it’s just me rattling around in my own head.
I can’t stop thinking about how badly my boys need their dad. Not some generic father figure or a box to check off. Me—actually me, all in, not just hanging around the house but really showing up in their world – perfect is not the goal but to excel is.
I’ve seen the stats, you know? What happens when dads aren’t there—the way kids end up fighting uphill battles, carrying scars that don’t fade. And even if you’re physically home, if you’re zoned out emotionally… man, that hits hard. I never want my sons feeling like I was right there but a million miles away.
Look, I try. I swear I do. But exhaustion creeps in, distractions pile up—work, stress, all the daily grind. Sometimes I wonder if they’re getting the real me or just whatever scraps are left after everything else.
That’s when the doubts sneak up: Am I doing enough? Am I even saying the right stuff? Am I living out this faith thing for them to see, or just mouthing the words?
But then I remember what You’ve promised—that You’ll never bail, never ghost us. You’re the Dad who sticks around, no matter how much we humans mess it up.
You never said I had to be perfect. Just be there. Love them. Keep showing up, even on those days when I’m running on fumes.
So tonight, I’m letting go of the pressure to carry everything alone. I’m putting my fears, my shortcomings, and my kids in Your hands.
I don’t have to be perfect. I just have to strive to excel – most of the time. And I trust that when I feel like I’m barely holding on, You’re the one holding all of us.
By Shaun Sima
https://chef-pocket.com/aboutme
